I smile to hide the tears in my heart

Once thought that the heart, has been as still as water; love, has fallen to brilliance. I hide all my injuries in my heart in order not to let others see my sorrow. I think, love, hurt, once is enough. I am a girl who is no longer willing to believe in love, so I have to stay away from it so that the pain can be reduced.

I met you with my paranoia about love. Seeing your delicate and beautiful face, I was surprised that a boy could be born so beautiful, which made me feel jealous and envious as a girl.

Every time I see your eyes, there is always a deep sadness; when walking behind you, your back is full of loneliness. Indeed, you always have little contact with others, just as there are always invisible obstacles that keep you away from others. You are a bitter person, because every time I see you, I will feel heartache.

However, every time you meet me, you can always smile as naively as a child. This is what your few friends told me. In fact, I can see it for myself. Because, I know your loneliness. However, I can not afford to love, I am far from as strong as I imagined, because it is love, so I can not bear again.

However, you are as paranoid as I am, as paranoid as I am about my love. My heart is still full of long-gone beauty and ash flying annihilation of a shadow, therefore, I do not allow my heart to tolerate any hope for love. Yes, this is really a lack of fairness to you. I don't give myself any chance.

You, but also a lonely person, when I am by your side, your beautiful and sad eyes can show a trace of clarity, just like the joy of sunshine through the dusty curtains. But every time I see your satisfied, naive, childlike smile, I feel heartache when I see that you only smile at me. Can I comfort you for your loneliness? Is this love?

You are a lonely shadow, I think I can not catch, unless you are willing to stop by my side. I have known this from the very beginning. You said to me, I am very happy by your side. I smiled and turned my back, but there were tears in my eyes. I know that you and I are like a straight line that will go farther and farther after meeting each other, and will eventually become strangers. But I still smiled and said to you, I will stay with you until the day when you no longer need me. You said to me firmly and angrily, no.

We're finally together. Many people do not understand, they think we want to be together a long time ago, but why do we stay together after so long?

You spoil me like a baby, love me, and indulge me. I know there are countless pairs of eyes hostile to me, because you make a lot of girls sad. However, I can not afford to love, every time I see your sincere face, I feel very guilty, because I can not respond to you as you love me. I don't understand. Why didn't you meet me in the first place?

I am too stupid to indulge in the past, even after we are together, sometimes I can't see you in my eyes. In fact, you know, always knew, but I thought I could fool you. The time we spent speechless with each other gradually increased, slowly accumulated into wounds that could never be healed, and we knew what should be over. Because, when you look at me, there is no more clarity in your eyes, only despair like an ancient wasteland, and this despair has been caused by me from the very beginning.

You finally chose to leave me. I thought this was the end I had expected. However, my heart, how can it hurt so much? My tears finally poured down. When I know who I love, you are no longer by my side.

I still do what I should do, for everyone, I still smile; I see another girl next to you, I still smile. After smiling, I will turn my back quietly in order not to let others see the tears in my heart.