Is it like this as you get older and lonelier and lonelier?
I feel more and more pessimistic. It seems that it has been going downhill since junior high school, and the more I think about it, the more it looks like this. It's just a whirlpool that can't stop when it starts. Why am I unhappy while everyone else is happy? Why? Isn't it sad that other people's destinies are controlled by myself, but I can't control my own destiny? In fact, this is not entirely fair, because from the beginning to the end of their own destiny is under their own control. If others can do it, so can you. Small to arrange their own time, to their own marriage events. For a family like me, it seems that choosing a partner is a matter for the whole family, but in other families, people go according to the feelings of their children. I think my family is very traditional, sometimes like this kind of family, but now I am a little tired of such a regular life.
However, let me go to find my own happiness, and I am afraid that I am too far away from my loved ones and I do not have the ability to live a good life. Sometimes I feel why I should make such a choice. Looking into the reason, I find that my heart seems to regard the future object as a labor force. I don't have to do anything but be a stay-at-home wife. To put it bluntly, it is a housewife. This is really bad for a person with a high degree. But I do not know since when it has been deeply ingrained, maybe it is caused by the love of the parents and the love of the elder brother, in fact, it is more to dote on themselves. I'm always in a bad mood these days. I think it's not a bad thing if 2012 comes. At least I can start over. However, I have forgotten that even if everything starts all over again and there is no change in my heart, it will not help.
Let's talk about our own problems. I accidentally lost him, but now I look at him smiling at others. I no longer care what you think for others. I don't care what you think. When I express my love to him again, everything I say is true, but he smiles and says you're not serious. Find a step for yourself and say yes. No result, no future.
I still have a stomachache when I think of it. I have a stomachache when I get a little news about you. I want to put you on the blacklist, but I don't want to give up. I'm afraid I don't have the ability to love anymore.
Author: Liu Xin Yi afternoon
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