Don't take yourself for granted

01

Recently, I found a phenomenon that some friends are about to get married, some friends have just started graduate school, and some friends have already had children, but some friends are still strictly abiding by the access control time at home.

My circle of friends is beginning to polarize: half are single dogs who are ready to get pregnant and have children soon after marriage, and half are single dogs who don't even know where their male (female) friends are.

Those who are not married are urged to get married by their elders, and those who are married are asked when to have children. We live a life that others take for granted, as if we had finished our task, but have you ever asked yourself whether your current life is what you wanted it to be in the first place?

Maybe some people just like the nine-to-five system life, but you obviously don't like it, but you have to drill with the tide, and finally you get in by your own hard study, and then what? Holding a thermos cup and telling everyone that this is not the life I want.

In fact, nothing should be done at your age. Other people's advice is just a suggestion. Listen casually, and your life still depends on your own decisions.

02

When I was in college, I knew a very famous teacher in the college. When I wanted to change my major for the postgraduate entrance examination, I went to ask him to help me choose one.

I thought he would talk eloquently about recommending various majors to me, but he refused. He said he never recommended majors to anyone.

I said why, ah, you are well-informed, and you must know the situation of many industries.

'first, it's a thankless thing to plan your life for others,'he said. 'second, I'm most afraid of teaching people how to be a person, because I haven't lived to understand it.

Slowly found that the more people have seen the world, the more small they feel, and those who sit around and watch the sky, often feel that they can do anything.

As said in Shawshank's Redemption, everyone is his own God. If you give up on yourself, who else will save you?

A friend of mine went back to his hometown after graduating from college and was persuaded by his parents to take an examination of a civil servant. Then, getting married and having children should be included in the girl's life schedule.

But on the eve of her engagement, she resolutely quit her job and went to Beijing.

She went to a media company to work in her favorite writing industry. With her talent and enthusiasm, she became content director three years later.

Many years later, she told me about her original decision, but she still admired her bravery.

03

On Zhihu, there is a question:

What is it that makes some people who looked particularly good in their student days become particularly ordinary people?

I think it must be their last blindly following the crowd and going with the tide.

And those who leave low and walk high must be because they have done something different from everyone else.

It must be because you follow your heart that makes you stand out from the crowd.

I still remember that Lei Hai, a takeout boy who stood out in the "Chinese Poetry Conference" earlier, how could he crush the talented talents of Peking University? the reason is to recite poems when other people watch live broadcasts and play games.

No matter what people say, it's enough for me to do what I like.

In the Water margin, Luda said a word at the time of his death:

When the letter came from the tide on the Qiantang River, I didn't know I was me until today.

People live like this once in their lives. If they don't even have the courage to do what they like, what's the point of life?