one
There is such a group of questions and answers on Zhihu.
Q: how to get out of the trough of life?
A: take a few more steps.
For those who have come out of the trough, this answer is classic and a bit simple, but for those who are in trouble, it does not seem to be of much help, because what is most difficult to face is the present.
For example, if you can't find a good job all the time, you ask your friend how to find the right job. A friend comforts you and says, "hold on and look for more."
However, you obviously looked for so long without success, so you have the pain of the moment, the so-called look for more, when is the end?
In other words, when you are lovelorn, a friend comforts you that you deserve a better person, maybe the next one will be better.
But do you want to catch the one you love more than the next one?
Only when you have a satisfactory job, a better partner, and a better life, can you look back and talk or laugh.
As a matter of fact, those years with stories used to be painful times, and only when they get through will they feel good.
two
Before the age of 23, my life is full of sunshine, smart, walk, 985, club president, campus love, the world's top 500 offer such key words into my growing experience.
Until a month before graduation, I was involved in a car accident. Although the diagnosis was not serious, the other company proposed to rescind the tripartite agreement on the grounds that it could not report on time. Communication is fruitless, although there is reluctance, but also have no choice but to accept, since then on the fork in life.
A few months later, I recovered, but the major companies had already finished the recruitment of new graduates, and social recruitment required work experience, so I was in a dilemma.
The job market is like a vegetable market, while I am an out-of-season Chinese cabbage, selling myself cheaply to a digital company as a salesman. From the world's top 500 to the counter of the Digital City, this painting style has become too fast and sudden. At that time, I sold MP3 in Digital City during the day and attended the company's training at night.
There is a proverb in ancient Egypt: only two kinds of animals in the world can reach the top of the pyramid, one is an eagle, the other is a snail.
But when I was young and frivolous, I always wanted to be an eagle. After all, the snail sounds a little Low.
After three months of selling MP3, I finally had a chance to go to a state-owned enterprise. My salary was much higher, and I didn't have to dance and shout slogans. I changed jobs without hesitation.
After joining the state-owned enterprise, I have been looking forward to the opportunity to return to the top 500. In those days, every month or two, there will be a week, while anxious, while secretly rejoicing that he has not become a frog in warm water.
At the beginning of 2012, there was an opportunity for promotion and there was great hope. I think that after years of waiting, I can finally keep the clouds open and see the moon. When I talked to my girlfriend at the time, she smiled and said, "my eyes were green when I spoke."
But then, we broke up, a five-year relationship ended like this, and the bright future that we had imagined collapsed.
Three days after the breakup, the leader told me that the promotion quota had been cut by the company.
The relationship is gone, the career is gone, I am confused.
What is a trough? There are different standards for different people, but there is a situation that applies to everyone: give you a bright future, and then smash it to pieces, this time, is the trough of your life.
three
How to get out of the trough of life?
The first step is acceptance. Accept the present self, accept the present life.
You can cry, or you can listen to a friend's story. In my most difficult time, two friends gave me a hand. One, like the sun, used her sad story to make me feel less lonely; the other, like a mirror, helped me rationally analyze the path I had taken over the years.
Der Spiegel told me: no matter which road you took before, you came out by yourself. Don't be too critical when you fail, and don't be too complacent when you succeed. Both history and life stumble forward between chance and necessity.
When the mood gradually faded, I learned to regard the trough as a normal life.
The second step out of the trough is to recognize yourself and find your own place.
Don't deceive yourself. The reason why the ugly duckling can become a white swan is not because it is ugly, but because its parents are white swans.
In this world, the only way for most people to succeed is to accumulate. When I figured this out, I was able to calm down, read some books, learn some musical instruments, and watch some movies, and these bits and pieces of accumulation have become the source of inspiration for my future writing.
The third step out of the trough is to find a way that suits you and keep going.
Everyone can have dreams and passions, but only those who know how to go and stick to it can be winners.
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