When I was very young, my mother told me a truth:
As long as people always have a son, they will not be afraid of losing face.
But as long as face-saving people, there will be absolutely no great success.
Don't lose face for the sake of face
Recently, I found a very interesting colleague, surnamed Lin, who is a little sister with glasses.
She is a newcomer to our office after the adjustment of the department. she is not familiar with the business and is a newcomer in experience.
The embarrassing thing is that her seniority and seniority are basically the same as those of the chief of staff, and no one dares to scold and educate her as a newcomer.
While everyone was struggling, she took the initiative to move to a steady little colleague. She immediately bowed her head and asked for advice when she encountered a problem she didn't understand. She was very humble and often brought gifts to express her gratitude.
In fact, according to her level, she can command us more confidently, and there is no need to be so subservient.
The little colleague was very embarrassed and repeatedly refused: you are the elder, it is right for me to help you, how can I still take your things!
Miss Lin shook her head and said softly, "you are my predecessor in our office. Please give me a lot of advice in the future."
Not putting on airs, not showing face, not saving face, but accumulating experience silently, she soon gained a foothold in the office and won the hearts of the people.
Sure enough, the director is going to leave soon, and the first choice for the company to consider is this Miss Lin.
Yishu wrote in "the first half of my Life": face is the most difficult thing to let go, but also the most useless thing.
Chinese people like to pay attention to face and inside. if face is respect, then Li Zi is strength.
When you put down your face and focus on improving your strength, when you do a good job, face will naturally come back to you, and you can't shake it off.
Face is always the foil of Li Zi, and Li Zi is the real source of face.
This reminds me that when I was in school, those students who usually falsified their grades, plagiarized and cheated, thought they were unrestrained and unrestrained.
Really encountered a large-scale examination, the program became strict, instantly hit back to the original, humiliating, but also disappointed the family.
As Zheng Yuanjie said, people who want to save face will lose face in the end.
No one doesn't want to be respected, but we also know that people only respect people with strength.
Convincing people with strength is always more convincing than power, and it is easier to get face.
Only with Li Zi can you have face.
There is also an old saying that you should save face and suffer.
I have a former colleague, Xiaofan, who practiced this sentence alive.
Her family is only ordinary, but she likes to use famous brands, just leather bags, shoes, clothes, perfume, the price of these daily necessities has been beyond the burden, need to overdraft credit card consumption.
Not to mention the chauffeured car she calls to and from work every day, the high-end cuisine she eats at noon, and her holiday trip abroad.
In this case, she has to spend her boyfriend's money, but which man can stand such extravagance and waste?
As acquaintances, it is not that we have not advised her, but Xiaofan thinks that he should take advantage of his youth to enjoy a high quality of life and say confidently:
If you want to be distinguished in front of others, you must suffer after them. Only with splendor will people give me face.
She also knows that she is looking for suffering, credit cards and flowers, and always has endless bills, but if not, how can she maintain the illusion of extravagance and delicacy in her moments.
Now that she has changed several boyfriends and lost her job because of idleness, I watched her post fewer and fewer moments and finally disappeared into life.
Many people think that face is given by others, but in fact, face is earned by themselves.
If you have some strength, others will give you some face, and the face accumulated by lies and vanity must be vulnerable and difficult to last for a long time.
According to the latest Hong Kong rich list released by Forbes magazine a few days ago, Mr. Li Ka-shing has been the richest man in Hong Kong for the 21st year in a row with a fortune of US $31.7 billion.
He made an incisive comment on the relationship between face and money:
When you lose face and make money, it shows that you are sensible.
When you use your money to save face, it means you have succeeded.
When you can make money with face, it shows that you are already a person.
When you still stay there drinking, bragging, do not know anything and pretend to know, only love the so-called face, it means that this is your life.
Money, like knowledge and strength, is also a kind of human being.
For the rest of your life, you should believe that Li Zi is more important than face. with Li Zi, you will have face.
We respect scholars, tycoons and all those with strength, but we do not respect hypocrisy.
People who really have face must also have the strength to match.
Face is propped up inside.
There is a magical character in The Demi-Gods & Semi-Devils, who has no name and is a floor-sweeping monk.
When watching TV dramas, I felt that this man was really boring. He was so good at kung fu, but he just hid in the Shaolin Temple and did some chores to clean the court.
But looking back now, we can see that the sweeping monk has lived his whole life as Li Zi, so the thing of face is irrelevant and readily available to him.
One of the best in the world, in front of him, are vulnerable to a single blow, who dares to say that this thin old man in green shirt does not have much face?
But for ordinary people, we still want to have both face and face, so that we can have both strength and respect.
The process of saving more and more face must be the process of getting stronger and stronger.
In the case of insufficient strength, if you want to hold on to a too big name, the result can only be moral non-coordination and self-destruction.
Take the entertainment industry as an example, that is:
People who don't have enough acting skills insist on becoming a movie queen or film star, and as a result, they are mercilessly ridiculed by everyone.
People who do not have enough knowledge insist on getting a degree and fabricating, and as a result, they are despised and disgraced.
In addition to the so-called gold and jade, the false face will collapse sooner or later.
And people with real strength will withstand all the tests and finally gain the respect of the world.
For example, those people we have always admired, such as Cai Yuanpei, Yang Jiang, Yuan Longping and Tu Youyou, have worked hard in their own field, and if they have excellent insights, they will naturally have face, and they will be indestructible and indestructible.
When you feel embarrassed, you have to see if you have a son on the inside.
When you are too obsessed with face, ask yourself if it is worth saving face.
After figuring out the relationship between face and Li Zi, for the rest of my life, I will be able to live freely, rich and strong.
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