The blatant youth like a kaleidoscope always has to lower its haughty head in front of reality. Even if I am very excited, even if I complain, even if I am aggrieved, I have to make a quiet heart make waves in order to live.
Looking at the words I had written, I was dizzy with a touch of salty sadness.
Literature has a long way to go, because of love, so with this driving force to today. Write all the time, no one reads it, write to yourself, no one likes it, applaud yourself.
You said, "as long as you love, you will pursue it bravely, and there will always be results." "really?" I asked you in doubt.
Following the path of love, I slowly move forward, reading every day, accumulating some knowledge and accumulating material for writing. Gradually, the level of writing has not improved much, but I have formed a habit that I have to read every day. Not reading for a day is like panicking without eating. Once, I forgot to read because I was tired of driving home. I slept until midnight and sat up looking for a book for several hours.
After writing for a period of time, I tried to throw some articles to newspapers and magazines to try my luck. Maybe it was luck. After more than a month, I was surprised to receive a sample magazine. Seeing my text printed on the paper with a strong smell of ink, I was ecstatic and began another round of fantasies. Perhaps, life is like this, let you eat some sweetness and firmly think that it will be plain sailing in the future, and then you will be bombarded with setbacks, rejected, and thrown at you like a cannonball, no matter whether you can bear it or not. how can the immutable law break the precepts here?
But I was so scared that I still longed for a paradise where my article was accepted or not, but people were happy to read it and even thought that my writing could become their psychotherapist. In fact, this is still an extravagant hope, but I will be very happy.
I remember once when I was in my first year of high school, after reading Bi Shumin's "looking back 500 times in this life", I wanted to write with a pen in my itchy hands. I spent the afternoon writing a prose entitled looking back 500 times in this life. I am also very proud to show to the people next to him, who knows that he does not understand amorous feelings, but also said that my writing is not good at all, satirizing my articles can not be published in the magazine.
Of course, I also know very well how the words written at my level at that time can be in the hall of elegance, but I have backbone, I am not convinced, but I still cry without spirit. At that time, I remember that I cried for a long time, but my good friend still couldn't stop persuading me. I just thought why I didn't believe me. Am I really that bad? I don't believe it. I don't believe that my literary dream is an alternative fantasy. So I took the Chinese class very seriously and wrote down every word the Chinese teacher said. I just wanted to prove to everyone that your total negation of me will certainly become a top-secret weapon against you in the future.
At that time, I was young and I was not afraid of heaven and earth. I thought that if I talked big, I could scare everyone.
Later, when I was praised by the teacher for the progress of the article, my heart was still in full bloom. This has strengthened my dream, as you said, as long as you work hard, there will always be a return.
I am more devoted to writing articles, writing novels, and contributing to newspapers and magazines, regardless of whether there is a reply or not. If you throw a little more, the hope will be greater. No one knows that when I pursue my dream and fight for it, I am like a headless fly on the road of life.
The more you stick to it, the more you feel that there is a kind of powerlessness. Sometimes even if you work hard, without Bole, Chollima will always be an ordinary horse that can be slaughtered.
Experienced a lot, but I still adhere to the original dream, my literary dream, my writer's dream.
Now occasionally be published articles, the heart will still be very happy, simple.
Today's stability is always with some sour taste, I think this is youth.
At the beginning, I worked very hard for my dream, even if I didn't have success, food and clothing, those gorgeous, rich, arrogant things, the profligate life was still 108000 miles away from me, but I didn't feel sorry for anyone. I still feel free and easy. Swagger. Because of the struggle for the truest and truest dreams, youth appears to be very precious.
(original creator: Mo Yao Zhuxi)
Post a comment