Women

In the fast food restaurant after dinner, sporadic customers take their meals leisurely, uniformed waiters bury their heads at the counter or chat quietly, soothing music flutters gently, and the air is filled with afternoon idleness. You and I sat by the window, a cup of tea, a plate of snacks, small talk, you opened your heart.

I really don't know you for a long time. On that evening, you and I were walking alone. Before and after, your skinny body was elongated and shortened under the street lamp, and the short hair floated slightly in the night wind. I have the impulse to know you. After a few words of greeting, I actually felt like I knew each other at first sight. Later, we began to make an appointment for a walk and play around together. Once, I met an old couple, silver-haired, energetic, climbing uphill, considerate to each other and loving each other. Can not help but stop, I said, life is accompanied by people who love each other, why fear that the face is getting older, life is not easy! I really miss my lover in the north, but you suddenly remain silent and look up for a long time. There seems to be sadness in your eyes. You say, sometime, I'll tell you my story.

In this lazy afternoon, you used a flat tone to let me know today's metropolis, and the woman who lives like you!

You used to be a cashier of a listed company, meticulous thinking, not good at many words, very dedicated work attitude is highly valued by the boss. Having a son and a daughter, my husband works as the chief physician in a big hospital and earns a lot of money. There are already two houses in this scary metropolis. My husband is clean and gentle, and people who know him say he is a good man, while you are slim, but also elegant and clean, very good-looking.

You met and got married in a small county. He swore an oath before marriage. Soon after his marriage, his nature was exposed. He was narrow, selfish, bad-tempered, and every penny had to be turned upside down. Every minute of the itinerary should be explained clearly. Trivial things will be restless. You will be patient, reasonable and useless. If you fight according to reason, you will get abuse, or even punching and kicking. Finally, in the case of being beaten to pieces in the face, you decided to hold your newborn son and sue for divorce! This time, under the guarantee of his snot tears, and under the comfort of relatives and friends, it came to an end. But from then on your nightmare began, in front of outsiders, he showed due diligence and hard work, running all the way from a small county to a metropolis and settling down. But at home, hot violence and cold violence make you miserable. You must carefully follow his mind and serve young and old without complaining. Apart from work, you do not have any circle of life of your own. You are so frugal that you do not wear clothes worth hundreds of yuan, not to mention jewelry luxuries. You have no control over the family economy at all. You have to apply for all your wages, and you have to apply for groceries. Also listen to his nagging and abuse, the children also learned to see his face, the whole family is living in fear, always worried that he will break out. At this time, home is completely your suffering place, you seldom communicate, let alone play hand in hand. Go to work conscientiously, go home immediately after work, and mechanically do housework that can never be done. Such a situation will not be calm for long, by chance you found that there is a woman outside him, is one of his patients, they open a room to eat, chat and play. When you found out about this, you didn't have much pain, but there was a kind of relief. You plucked up the courage to tell him, divorce, you find your happiness. But he turned his face and did not admit it, took a bite, and was furious after his backhand was beaten, pointing to your nose, making you shut up, do your own thing, and do nothing else!

In the dead of night, I looked at the man around me countless times, filled with grief and indignation, wanted to cry without tears, and no sorrow was greater than death. From then on, I lived like a walking corpse.

Hearing this, the rim of the eye has been red, I really can not bear to think, how your skinny body can bear that brutal fist! How to bear the kind of humiliation in my heart! Why do you have to defend a family? there are courts, women's federations, and you shake your head helplessly. In fact, relatives, friends and colleagues all think that this home is perfect, and it is normal for him to stumble and bump. But he, in front of outsiders, is very good at performance, even in the unit, treat his patients are gentle, who would have thought that he has another side! And you don't want to be sister-in-law Xianglin, crying everywhere, you have no choice but to knock out your teeth and swallow your stomach, thinking about the growth of a pair of children and thinking about his change of heart.

Last year, my son graduated from college to work. After he went wild again, the son took you by the hand and said, Mom, leave him! The children are old enough to take care of themselves, so don't stay in this family! On that day, you stayed up all night, after thinking about it, you should pay off the debt owed to him in your previous life, make up your mind, sue and divorce!

After months of quarrelling and running around, with the support of a pair of sons and daughters, there is finally a result. You leave everything behind and leave the house clean. When you said that when you left, your daughter went to school and your son went to work. He had not seen him for many days. You cleaned up the house where you had lived for more than 20 years and went out the door with a few pieces of clothes. The moment the door behind you slammed shut, it seemed to unload the heavy burden. First we temporarily borrow the family together, and then we find a small one-room apartment. When the boss knows what happened to you, he specially pays you two months' salary to adjust your body and mind and come back to work.

Now you have been single for more than half a year. You said that you can look at the past calmly, in any case, he will not curse him, he does not want to fill his chest with hatred; you say that after work, he lives in a shack of more than ten square meters, a bed and a table, boil some porridge, order pickles, go out for a walk, the whole body is relaxed, suddenly feel that the world is vast.

Listening to the steady narration of your tone and waves at the bottom of my heart, I don't know how you went through those years and how to get out of the swamp in your heart. I feel sorry for you. How important marriage is to a woman, unsuitable two people, tied together for many years, how many good times are consumed in the gloom, the geometry of life, how sad!

The sun outside the window is bright, and everything is full of vitality in the verdant summer. Sad pain, happy beauty, experience also let the past, the years have passed, people are more likely to grow old, there is always a rush to look forward, pick up a good mood, we continue to go on the road!

Brief introduction of authorized first author: Cui Qin, middle school physics teacher. Like to use words to interpret the mood, with the picture frame beautiful. After work, some random essays and novels are scattered on some magazine network platforms and have been well received.