My nephew is fourteen years old and it's a good time to go to school, but he hasn't been to school since September 2014. Asked why, he said that the school was too complicated to read. In fact, the nephew is very smart, and he is good at learning in class, especially when he is always above 100 in math, that is, he is weak in English. His parents always quarreled when he was young and divorced in 2006.
His father married his current wife more than two years after his divorce, and his married life has been stumbling ever since. His mother made friends several times after the divorce, but finally failed to enter the marriage hall again, so far she lives alone.
My nephew grew up with his grandparents. He had a deep affection for his grandparents and was sensible at home. He helped his family and neighbors to do what they could. According to my parents-in-law, if anyone invites him to be a guest at home, he must first ask if he has invited his grandparents. If his grandparents don't go, he won't go. My nephew still lives with his grandparents. His father arranged a room for him in their own house, and he had never been there once. Asked why, he said that he had a weak relationship with his father, and his mother was not his real mother. In grandparents, there is a feeling of home, relatives and warmth.
According to his family, his nephew once said that if his real parents were old one day, he would support his mother, but he did not care about his father. I also heard from my family that my brother wailed after a drunken drink. It is my son who says that I am most sorry in this life. Because of the damage done to the children by the failure of their marriage, the children are now abandoning their studies, and the father's self-remorse and remorse are irreparable.
Why is it that many things in this world are precious only after they are lost?
Fire and water are a couple who come from other places to do business in Suizhou. When he came, he held his full moon daughter in his hand and settled down in Suizhou with 4000 pictures of Grandpa Mao in his arms. After several years of hard work, business is finally in full swing. A three-room three-story building was built in my hometown, and the decoration was completed. Today, my daughter is in the fourth grade and my son is more than three years old. In our eyes, it is a happy family.
There is a saying that men go bad when they have money, and it is true at all. As soon as there is a surplus in life, a man's fancy intestines begin to turn upside down. After the water learned that the fire was having an affair, it didn't cry, make trouble and hang herself like other women. She thought that it was not surprising for a man to secretly talk outside once in a while, as long as he still had the family in his heart, it would be okay to turn a blind eye. The fire is still taken care of in an orderly way, which makes all the men and women in this street envy. Even so, the fire still asked for divorce and asked for water to go. If there is no divorce, there will be many unreasonable conditions.
Water finally chose to compromise, which we do not understand. A fly fell in the bowl, which was difficult for anyone to swallow and threw it away as quickly as possible, but she not only ate it, but also smiled. I can't figure it out. No one can figure it out. Now it is not a feudal society, and the standard of three obedience and four virtues has long been a thing of the past. Today, when the legal system is so sound, why do we have to live without dignity?
That day Shui came to my house and said to me: divorce, simple. It's not that I can't live alone. I can't raise two children. The key is how I face the child, when the child asks me & lsquo; father, where is it & rsquo;, what should I answer? I would rather be hurt and aggrieved than hurt or wronged children. I must create a happy family for my children, even if it is false!
The parents of a classmate of my daughter also divorced for various reasons. When she was not divorced, her classmates always told her daughter that the thing they were most afraid of every day was their parents' quarrel, and the word they were most afraid of hearing was divorce. To this end, my daughter once wrote in "my greatest wish": what I want most is that all the parents in the world will stop quarreling and that all the children in the world have a happy home!
Parents, have you ever thought about how much harm your quarrels do to your children? Do you know how scared they are in their young hearts?
Yes, divorce is easy. But what about after the divorce? Divorce will do more harm to your relatives than to your children. Cheerful personality, will slowly heal the wound; introverted, because of the loss of a complete home, the lack of love, will become talkless, afraid to communicate with others, contact with society. Also do not want others to ask parents' questions, when see other children have parents to play, their hearts will shed tears, will feel inferior. No matter how kind his grandparents and aunts are to him, he is lonely. Like nephews, parents seldom attend parent-teacher meetings at school. I spend far more time with my grandparents than my parents 365 days a year.
In the process of growing up, children need not only material satisfaction, the most important thing is to have the warmth of the family and sense of security. In the process of growing up, their parents have been in the most important position. If a parent lets go of his child when he or she is a minor, the most important journey of the first 1/3 of his child's life will be ruined. If the foundation is not laid well, it will have an impact on the future career and success.
I've been thinking about a question-what on earth are we living for? What exactly do we want in the city of marriage? Everyone has different understandings and views on this issue. Through every bit of things, Xue Li believes that children and us are the most important. When we leave this world one day, all the halos of our lives will disappear, and as a continuation of our lives, our children will not only inherit the family line for us, but also walk the road we have not finished, or make the road we have taken more perfect.
I think we can only be parents once in this life, and our children are everything to us! It can be said that if the child succeeds, we are 100% successful! If the child fails, we are 100% failed! Aren't all our efforts and hard work for the children? Does everything make sense without children?
A person living in the world must know what is the most important, the most precious, and what is really worth fighting for. You may not be able to win over the right time, the right place, and the right person, but you must have to deal with the world and be a person. Parents, regardless of your congenital conditions, should first create a warm, loving, sunny and sense of security family for their children.
For the sake of the future of the children, please think twice about what you do if you are facing a family crisis. I hope each of you will live not only for yourself, but also for the responsibilities on your shoulders.
Do not divorce your rich husband and wife because of the temptation of bright lights, the hardships of sharing joys and sorrows, and the glory of power and status. Love is to look each other in the eye, marriage is a matter of mutual willingness, and having children is also for the continuation of life. No one pushes anyone, but willingly. Please cherish each other's fate, tolerate each other in marriage, understand each other, and spend the rest of your life together!
If you really can not be together for some reason, then please, show mercy, please minimize the harm to the child.
Author: Xue Li every year
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